How to be Socially Savvy?

The dying question we all like to know…“What is the secret about socially savvy people that makes them exceptionally social, and how can we be like them?”

Have you ever been puzzled by somebody who always have the right thing to say at the right time almost like they’re psychic anticipating every upcoming response?

It’s like they have some sort of worldly magical X-factor unknown to the naked eyes.

These socially savvy folks will knock your socks off with their gifted conversational skills and can keep motor-mouthing nonstop regardless how irrelevant or random the topic is to exhaustion, and leave you in the dust with their quick-wit in generating witty responses out of the hat. There is always something intriguing about being around these natural social-butterflies.

They all have great social skills.

Unfortunately, not all of us are socially witty and have spontaneous conversational materials to talk about every time different situations come up, and doesn’t it suck to be the quietest one around other people? Obviously, you want to contribute more to the conversation, but you’re engulfed in unfamiliar topics.

To help you in your social dynamics interaction, you want to build a large social toolbox of your mojos, like your techniques, stories, humor, lines, questions, routines, openers, and conversational materials that can be pulled out at anytime to be used.

I called this your sociability.

Comedians always have their toolboxes stocked with jokes and routines before performing on stage.

Build up your sociability, especially having great stories, as storytelling is pretty much the biggest thing that fuels your social interaction. When armed with these tools, you will socialize a lot more effectively, with the added benefit of enhancing your social skills for the long-haul so you can stop relying on them.

Eventually you start picking up the usual patterns of a good social dynamics interaction. Your social intuition will sharpen with knowledge of how one particular response will trigger another, and know where the conversation should lead and how to lead it there.

But wait!

Now what’s probably on your mind is…

“So now I have to memorize a ton of stories, routines, and conversational materials until my mind explodes?”

No, here’s the great part…

Instead of memorizing a myriad of routines to have tons of conversational materials, know the structural formula behind those routines, but most importantly, develop your own social structures.

What is a “social structure“?

It is your very own structural formula for generating unique new responses in any form of social interaction.

In the dating scene, you might have heard about using canned scripted materials and routines for interacting effectively with women and getting them attractive to you.

Now how about instead of memorizing the routines and canned materials, why not just learn the formula and structure of those canned materials and routines, so that way you can take your current particular social situation and plug it into your social structure to generate new conversational materials every time on the spot?

People who are socially savvy always coming up with quick responses have, without realizing it, developed a lot of social structures built upon each other and interconnected from all the socializing they have done, making it easily and quickly for their architectural social mind to guide them in generating quick responses subconsciously.

Think of it like a much more completed social blueprint for their mind, compared to those who are socially unskilled.

If you were a math geek like I was, do you remember the quadratic formula? It looked something like this:

All you had to do was memorized this one little formula, and you could pretty much do all sorts of algebra problems.

One of the most famous structure in improvisation is the “yes, and…” where you agree with whatever the other person said and add more details to continue the flow. Just knowing this one little formula structure, and you can act out a whole lot of improvisational scenes.

I’ll be giving you some of my powerful social structures down the road in later installment.

(To download the PDF version saved to your computer for easy reference, go here.)

(DOWNLOAD – How to be Socially Savvy?)

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