I have talked about using obviousation – “the power of being obvious” to break awkward conversation silence and social interaction stalemate, and also to approach and meet women.
Now I want to take it to the next level by showing you how to apply it to handle girls’ rejection and noncompliant cold-behavior and built a deep rapport for a connection she won’t forget.
When you approach a girl, or already talking to a girl, and she’s acting like a bitch and giving you cold buying-temperature, or if you just simply want to take the interaction to a deeper connection…get real and be obvious to get to true heart of the matter.
Before moving forward, first thing I want you to put in your mind as a belief system is…there’s no such thing as a bitch, it’s only a bitch shield.
Having this belief that “there is no such thing as a bitch but it’s only a bitch shield”, will affect how you interact with a girl…by ignoring all the negative behaviors she exhibits as a bitch shield and be able to see the good in her, and she will behave that way you expect her to.
Now what is a “bitch shield”?
A bitch shield is a defense barrier girls put up to deflect guys from hitting on them by appearing intimidatingly unapproachable or intentionally rude at first to see you can break through that bitch shield.
Another way of looking at it, is thinking it as a shit test, a test to see if any REAL cool, confident-guy can see through that bitch shield and approach her regardless of her intimidating appearance and cold buying-temperature she puts up to scare off other weak, unconfident-men.
For example, you approach her, and she gives you this shit test to see how you would handle it like a confident man…
Girl: “I have a boyfriend.” (the most prominent widely used shit-test girls use)
You: “Do all the guys who talk to you, you assume they’re hitting on you?”
She wants to see if you can see through this. Most of the time she will not have a boyfriend. If she does, she wouldn’t come out abruptly saying it, but be friendly and at least talk to you for a few minutes, and you will eventually find that out throughout the night.
By obvilizing the obvious truth will deflect rejection and disarm girls’ bitch shield behaviors and will separate you from other guys
When I approach hot bartenders and when have normal conversation with them…of course, they think I’m hitting on them like all the other guys; however, I neutralize that “being hit on” framing they had of me, by calling out the obvious of what they thought I was doing, by asking them, “How many guys hit on you per night?” That change their frames about me and place me in a different category.
(Obviously, they have to be nice as part of being a bartender; however, it is a “cold, forced-fake-niceness” I like to describe it. If you have ever interacted with a stripper or sleazy salesman, you would know what I mean, it’s overly forced and seem fake.)
Oblivized Statements to Disarm Girls’ Bitch Shield
Say stuffs like these to build instant connection with the other person anytime in the conversation and social interaction.
Example 1:
“So what’s it’s like for you being a girl and having douchey guys hitting on you all the time because you’re really gorgeous, and I bet lots of guys hit on you all the time…do you get sick of that or you find it flattering at first and then get tired of it?”
Example 2:
“You know how when 2 people meet the usual conversation is, ‘Who are you?’, ‘What’s your name?’, ‘What do you do?’, ‘Where are you from?’ So predictable and so boring conversation. I mean, can’t you guys think of something more interesting to talk about?”
Here are some obvilized statements adjusted for the bars and clubs scenes…
Example 3:
“Have you ever seen those guys who walk around in a nightclub in shades? It’s fucking dark in a nightclub, and they walk around wearing shades…thinking it’s cool or something, and it’s even funny when they trip. Come on…you’re not Sean comb, P. Diddy, Puff Daddy, or whatever his new name is now.”
Example 4:
“What do you think about nightclubs? Why do girls go to nightclubs? I just go out to have fun from a hard day and dance my ass off. Most guys go out to hit on girls. Don’t you hate when you’re dancing like this…”
(Now demonstrating by going up behind the girl like I’m trying to grind her.)
…and creepy guys surround you and your friends, going up from behind, and trying to rub their peckers on your behind. No, that’s creepy, and girls hate that. It’s disrespectful like girls are only just sex objects, and girls want to be respected, not be treated like creeps’ sex objects.”
(Now turning the conversation in a humorous direction.)
“You know I think you girls come here because you guys have a blast blowing guys off.”
(If you say something this, you will definitely differentiate yourself from other guys, and you become an insider into her female’s world, like you understand them.)
Example 5:
“Look around you…in this kind of environment, it’s really hard to act normal and be relaxed. You see the guys who tried to act all cool, while the girls acting bitchy when we know that’s not the case. You know, most guys think girls are bitches in a nightclub…but they’re not. They are like delicate flowers; it’s just a bitch shield they put up as a defense to avoid creepy guys, especially the hot girls with creepy guys hitting on them all the time. Every night it’s exhausting to be your best-self, and even if you want to talk to all the guys, you don’t have the time…but…only when there’s this one cool guy that comes along worthy of her investing effort and time to be her best self, she will be sweetest the person in the world.”
(Here when I say this part “there’s this one cool guy that comes along worthy of her investing effort and time to be her best self”…I point to myself. For those of you who don’t know, this is sort of a hypnosis-technique where I anchor what I said “cool guy” to “me“, that way in her mind…she will see me as that cool guy.)
Here’s one more adjusted example of an obvilized statement you can use for strippers, not that I recommend strip clubs but just as another example how you can come up with your own and easily alter them each time…
Example 6:
“Look around you…a lot of the dancers see us as loser guys trying to get into your pants, and a lot of these guys here do only want you because they see you as exotic dancers…but…this is not the real you. It’s just a role you play, a persona you put up. Behind all this, you’re just a normal person just like anybody else, who have insecurities, fears, aspirations, goals, and passion.”
NOW when a girl is really acting like a bitch to you…
Don’t ever get angry, upset, or scared. You could tease her about it to diffuse and hopefully disarm her bitch shield, but I found it to be more effective when I get real about it and obvilize and be genuine.
(Now I know there will probably be some guys out there who say, “I am a high status alpha male. I don’t give a fuck. It’s only her lost when she acts like a bitch.” Well, real words to you…you’re not going to get far with that kind of attitude that insinuates a subtle hint of misogyny, and women can sense that and avoid you. You’re not in some mob warzones, so drop the whole macho act and quit trying to be a fucking “tough guy”. It doesn’t serve you when you’re out being social and meeting girls.)
Example 7:
“Let me ask you something…why are you acting like this? Look, you’re a really gorgeous girl, and I know you probably get hit on by guys a lot…and it can be creepy, and you have developed certain default behaviors that counter these guys, making them think you’re a bitch…but…you’re really not. You’re just out to have a good time and have fun, and probably meet a really cool guy instead of those creeps that will probably constantly hit on you. The girls who put up the most bitchy behaviors, are the most insecure ones that get hit on a lot, and this defense is a way to avoid uncool guys who can’t see through that. And you’re a really gorgeous girl…and I don’t blame you for that.”
(When you say obvilized statements to disarm the girl’s bitch shield, always be sincere and genuine. The more bitchy her behavior has been, the more guilty she will feel. I talk about this “mountain emotional effect” in depth in my Art of Social Natural.)
Only If You’re a Real Genuine Confident-Man…
Most guys would avoid talking about these obvious things, but are, interesting enough, the ones actually doing these creepy things.
You on the other hand will separate yourself from them by actually mentioning these obvious things.
Only a truly confident guy would admit something like this…and it shows balls that you’re real.
Talk about the obviousation conversation that will disarm her bitch shield and separate you from other guys, and be genuine and sincere about it.
This is real talk right here.
It conveys strong genuine honesty, confident, and respect all at the same time for a girl…and should will have no reason to have an unnecessary bitch shield…at someone like you.
(To download the PDF version saved to your computer for easy reference, go here.)
(DOWNLOAD – Disarm Girls’ Bitch Shield to Avoid Rejection and Build Instant Rapport)
I give up girls are just weird lol