Word of the day…C-O-N-F-I-D-E-N-C-E.
Like the cowardly lion from The Wizard of Oz wishing he had courage, most men wish they have confidence with women.
I hear the word “confidence” all the time in the dating realm and for attracting women beaten to death over-and-over again.
Why not call it “courage” to give it a new ring-beat to revitalize its freshness and coolness? (I wish I had courage with women…sounds cool right?)
Confidence is just an emotion.
Actually, let me rephrase that…
Confidence is nothing more than just the absent emotion of fear, the absent of feeling of any potential embarrassment…and simply just do things with a void of these negative emotions to be calm, cool, and collected in composure.
In fact, when you’re calm, cool, and collected…do you realize you’re just emotionless but very focused on whatever task you set your mind to?
It’s all just a state of mind.
Remember back in school in science class, where the teacher said “darkness was just the absent of light,” and “coldness was just the absent of heat“…same thing with confidence is just the “absent of fear.”
Now I’m not saying you should go out get a lobotomy procedure to numb your emotions because you’ll be doing more harm to yourself as a vegetable, without any excitement and passion in your life…which are other components of confidence. When you’re excited and passionate, this is the emotional side of confidence overriding any fear to stay absent.
The problem becomes when people make confidence as some magical supernatural-force out there that is supposed to solve every one of your problems in life advocated by all sorts of gurus out there, without actually giving you the specialized-comprehension needed.
That’s like teaching you how to be a doctor, and you’re going find a cure for every aliment…and all you need to accomplish that is just confidence.
Listen, you can be the most confident person in what you do, but if you don’t know what you’re doing, you’re still not going to perform so well because confidence without competence is nothing by itself, even if you “fake it til you make it.”
Now, of course, confidence is very important. It is the fuel you need to initiate and push through whatever it is you want to accomplish in life and learn as you go. Without confidence, you won’t have the balls to implement whatever competence you learn; they work synergistically hand-in-hand.
Just don’t overcomplicate what confidence really is.
(The magic trick is performed a lot simpler than what it may appear.)
